Nine on the Rocks
by mistywaters22
Summary: Set after Hard Eight: Steph's takedown goes wrong, now she's got a psycho hot on her tail, a cheating boyfriend in her sights, and a Latino sex god and company looking to put her on lock down. Who say's blondes have more fun? :
1. A Series of Unfortunate Events

**Disclaimer: Ya'll know the drill. I own nothing remotely related to the Stephanie Plum novels. Although, I do own a box of Butterscotch Krimpets, that counts for something right? All the characters a property of the wonderfully brilliant mind of Janet Evanovich. I wouldn't mind owning a Ranger clone. At this point I'm even willing to settle for a Ranger Commando doll. **

I'm not sure exactly how I find myself in these situations, or to be more exact, how these situations manage to find me. But here I am Stephanie plum Bounty Hunter Extraordinaire, well more like Bounty Hunter close my eyes and hope for the best, handcuffed and locked in the trunk of my own car. My life is shit. Okay I have a few options, I can call my on-and-off again boyfriend Morelli (currently on) a.k.a Super cop and endure another one of his Italian rants. Yipee. I can call my mentor Ricardo Carlos Manoso, a.k.a Ranger, a.k.a Batman and risk being sexual assaulted, although I'm pretty sure you can't rape the willing. Or maybe I can just live in here. Really if I think about it it's not too bad. Decent amount of space, no overexposure to sunlight, maybe Pino's even makes deliveries. Before I even realize I'm doing I've whipped out my phone and started dialing the first number that came to mind.

"Yo"

"Yo yourself"

"Babe?"

"Are you busy?" I really don't want to do this, but it's too late to hang up on Ranger. The Merry Men recently informed me Rangers collected quite a few frequent flyer miles, and with the threat of being shipped off to a third world county I've been being as obedient as my personality will allow.

"Depends"

"On…" See I could be monosyllabic to.

"Should I update my health insurance?" What a joker.

"I'm in a tricky situation."

"Where are you."

"Parked outside of Pino's"

"Be there in ten" click.

While I'm waiting for Ranger I've got plenty of time to ponder how I ended up in this situation. Stupid Frankie Barlow. I had spent nearly 15 minutes playing merry go round the car trying to handcuff him. And as luck would have it ended up being stunned by my own stun gun, and tossed into my own trunk.

Ranger would never have this problem, all Ranger had to do was look at an FTA and they would throw themselves in the trunk. Ranger's the shit, he make Rambo look like mighty mouse. I haven't talked to Ranger for almost three weeks, ever since my night of ruination. We spent one night together while Morelli and I were on a break, and then the next morning he told me to go back to Morelli, because his life didn't lend it's self to relationships, Yup, he actually said that to me, it sounds like it deserves a spot in a b-movie or something.

My phone rings and jars me out off my thoughts.

"ello" I answer.

"Babe?"

"Yes Ranger"

"I'm standing next to your car, where are you?"

In response to his question I begin to beat to the trunk and scream.

"Oh" Click.

Just once I'd like to hang up on him first.

Seconds later the trunk is popped open and I see warm liquid eyes surveying me for damage. Ranger reaches in and grabs a hold of my waist and pulled me out of the trunk.

'Thanks" I mumble trying not to meet his eyes. He digs in the pocket of his S.W.A.T. pants and produces the keys to the handcuffs.

"No problem. You're saving me from a stack of paperwork. Anyway I need you for a job."

Uh-Oh, the last job I took from Ranger entailed getting felt up by a pushy druggie. Not exactly my idea of a good time.

"When?"

"Tonight 8:00"

"It's already 5:00." I whined, then instantly regretted it when an image of me hunched over a sewing machine in a sweatshop floated through my head.

I cleared my throat. "Give me the spill."

Ranger swiftly walked over to his black CR-V, and returned a few moments later with a file. It looked a bit thick. I prayed this guy was just a kleptomaniac who forgot his court date. Not such luck.

"Michel Rims" I read out loud. "Wanted for counterfeiting, racketeering… That doesn't sound too bad" I flipped the page and continued. "Domestic abuse, sexual assault, suspect in murder." Mental gulp. I looked back up at Ranger whose face was etched in its normal stoic expression.

"I'll be ready."

Three hours later I was wondering why I had agreed to this. Oh yeah, it was either this or the third world country, and I've heard how humid it gets, humidity and my hair don't mix. Give me the psychotic rapist any day. I'm just sliding into my four inch FMP's when the locks begin to tumble. A normal person would be freaking out by now. I'm not a normal person. I smile as Lester and Bobby shove their way into the apartment each trying to score the better view. Both of them were sexy as hell, it might be a requirement if your work with Ranger. Humm I'd have to ask him about that. I knew I looked good dressed in the tight little black dress every female should own. My hair was having a good day, and was piled high on my head in a twisty-do. The result of my outfit was half-classy-half-trashy. Guaranteed to turn on any straight guy in a ten-yard radius.

"Ready boys" I smiled cheekily.

"You have no idea how ready" Lester faked a stage whisper. Any other women would have been reaching for the condoms and tugging him to the bedroom. But I had another guy on my mind. I sashayed up to the two and linked my arms with both of them.

"Let's get the party started gentlemen."

Lester, having the gentlemen routine down pack, made sure to make a big show of opening the lobby door for me. Ditto with the truck door. I wondered if it was making Ranger jealous, damn where had that come from. I climbed in the truck and was immediately disappointed.

"Where's Ranger" I asked trying to sound nonchalant.

"He'll meet us out back."

Sure enough, as we pulled up to the back of the club, I spotted a lone figure leaning against the wall. I took a deep breath squared my shoulders like I was going into battle. Which technically I was. I strode up to Ranger, who was decked out in his normal army pants and black t-shirt that looked as if it had been spray painted on, and pasted a big smile on my face.

Ranger retuned the smile and pulled a small mic out of and envelope. Instead of letting me slip it into my bra he took the liberty of sliding his fingers in and clipping the mic on.. His touch was warm, and my breath caught. I tried not to collapse at his feet. When I looked into his eye and saw that they had turned darker with desire. Not good.

He pulled me close "Babe…"

As suddenly as he grabbed me, he let me go. He nodded as he slid into the shadows, indicating it was time to make my grand entrance.

**Hi guyz, I'm looking forward to some feedback, yes even constructive criticism. I'm a total glutton for punishment, even if it's at my own hands. **

**REESE**


	2. The Takedown

**Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it. **

Eyes from every corner of the room trained on me as soon as I entered the room. Ranger and I had already decided how to play this one. I would go for the recently cheated on routine. I was real good at that, all I had to think about was catching Joyce Barnhardt, and my ex-husband Dickie Orr bare-assed testing the durability of my dining room table, and I could give Audrey Hepbrun a run for her money. I scanned the bar until I saw Mike, and then began to make my way over to him, pretending not to notice the attention I was attracting. I plopped my self onto the stool and sighed pretending to be upset. My cell phone rang on schedule.

"Yo Babe."

"Hey Tina it's me" I began to start through my well-rehearsed skit.

"You in place"

"Yes, I can't believe that asshole"

"Lester will bring your drinks to you."

In order to attract the attention of little Mikey, and well little Mikey, I had to make sure he heard the one-sided conversation. I had to make sure he knew I was about to get stone faced drunk, which I really wasn't about to do, Lester was all set to bring out non-alcoholic drinks to me.

"I can't believe that bastard, right in my own bed with his skanky trash"

"He biting?"

I risked a look in Mike's direction and caught him eyeing me.

"Yes, like the bastard he is."

"Good Lester will be there in five, make sure you liquor him up"

"That slime ball sleeze. Next time I see him I'm gonna run him over with my jeep, then I'm gonna cut his balls off, and beat him with them." Oops a flash back of Dickie and Joyce.

"Ouch, babe remind me not to piss you off. I'm out" Click

I pretended he was still on the phone.

"Yeah, I'm gonna be here for a while, no you don't have to pick me up, I'll find a way home. Talk to ya later"

I hung up and smiled a Mike. He took this as an invitation and slid closer.

"Sorry I couldn't help over hearing your conversation, what kind of loser would cheat on a women like you. If you were mine I'd treat you right."

Yeah, I thought, I'm sure you'd treat me right to the hospital you abusive sonovabitch.

I gave him my best come hither look and crooked my finger. He leaned over and I whispered in his ear.

"I'm sure a man like you could keep a woman real satisfied." Yuck, the things I do for Ranger. Even a dumbass like him couldn't miss the innuendo. He slid his hand up my thigh and I bit back a gag.

" Satisfaction has never been a problem for me."

Lester walked over, saving me from having to come up with another trashy line.

"I'll take one of whatever he's having." I nodded towards Mike's empty glass.

"Long Island Ice Tea with a splash of lemon" Mike supplied never taking his eyes off me, or to be more specific my chest.

I was going to have to bleach my skin when I got home.

For the next thirty minutes I pretended to get drunk, while Mikey boy really did.

"So you wanna take this party somewhere else." Mike slurred.

"I'd love to." I purred pretending to enjoy his incessant groping, when all I really wanted to do was haul back and deck the guy. Mike picked up the tab and I nodded to Lester letting him know we were on the way out. As we were leaving someone knocked into me and I dropped my purse. I bent down to pick up my things that scattered out and was surprised to see Bobby hunching beside me.

"Bombshell your mic's out, make sure you get him straight out the front door." He whispered softly in my ear. I nodded slightly and stood up tugging down the hem of my dress. Bobby stumbled out the door pretending to be drunk. I started after him, but Mike tugged my arm.

"Let's have a little fun." He slurred.

Let's not. "Ohh I like fun." I purred.

He started dragging me to the back, and before I could prevent it we ended up in the men's bathroom. He quickly locked the door behind him.

"Ever had sex in a public bathroom." Shit shit shit.

"No…that's really unsanitary. Mold and germs everywhere." I took a step back trying to stall. He took a step forward. I was going to kill Ranger when I got out of this. Okay, so I was going to yell at Ranger when I got out of this. Mike reached out and snaked his arm around my waist and pulled me closer.

"Ummm, I should be getting home, my roommate, who's a cop by the way, will probably be getting worried about me." He ignored me and began licking my neck and trying to undo the zipper on my dress. This was getting too physical for me.

"Stop" I tried to push him away. He tightened his grip on my wrist and slid a thigh between my legs. That did it. I did what any self-respecting Burg woman would do, I hauled back and slapped him. Belatedly I questioned the wisdom of pissing off a psychotic rapist/murder, but like they say hindsight's a bitch. I cried out as he slammed me back against a stall.

"Oh you like it rough" He sneered. "Well so do I." He grabbed the back of my head and forced his tongue down my throat. Fear began to burn low in my belly, but I held back my tears. He was surprisingly strong even in his drunken stupor. Finally he pulled back to concentrate on unzipping his jeans. I began to scream, but I doubted anyone could hear me on account of the loud rock music playing in the bar.

"Oooohh baby that turns me on." He licked his lips. I pushed him off of me and made a mad dash towards the door. I was almost there when he grabbed a hold of my hair and yanked me backwards. I flailed my arms wildly as I fell to the ground. I fought and screamed and clawed at his face, but through it all he grinned.

"Ranger help" Damn I was crying now, and the tears were clouding my vision and choking me. When Mike bent down to kiss me again, I bit him. He let out a grunt and slapped me. My head hit the ground with a thud, and pain blasted through my head. Mike pinned my wrist in one of his hands and reached down and unzipped his pants with the other. The sound echoed through the bathroom and the enormity of what was about to happen hit me. He was going to rape me, and possibly kill me and Ranger was right outside.

All of a sudden Mike seemed to fly through the air. He crashed into the stall and slid down the wall unconscious. I looked up and saw Lester and Bobby cuffing him, and Ranger looking down at me. He was saying something to me, but I couldn't hear him, it was as if someone had stuffed cotton in my ears. I felt my stomach bubbling and I knew I was going to puke. I shuffled to my knees and crawled into a stall, and proceeded to empty my stomach of its contents. I felt a warm hand rubbing my back and holding my hair back, and knew it was Ranger. After I was done Ranger handed me a napkin and I wiped my mouth.

Finally I turned around to face him. I've seen Ranger upset a few time, but it was nothing compared to what I was witnessing now. His eyes were blazing and his jaw was clenched tight. But as gently as he could he scooped me up in his arms and stood up. When the door opened Tank, Lester, and Bobby were crowded around all looking anxious and worried. If this had been any other situation I might have laughed at the look on their faces. The ringing in my ears was beginning to fade and what Ranger was saying was beginning to register.

"Tank bring my car to the back. I'll take Steph home, Lester, Bobby take this piece of trash to the station before I put a bullet between his eyes." Yikes.

The guys galvanized into action making me think of a well-organized ant colony. Lester dragged Mike to his feet and began to pull him out the door. As he passed me he grinned. "Oohh baby you tasted so good, I can't wait to pick up where we left off." Ranger stiffened and tightened his grip around me. Lester 'accidentally' connected his boot to the back of Mike's leg. He went down like a bag of bricks, humm I was going to have to remember that move. I turned my head away, unable to look at the guy that had attacked me, and hid my face in the safety of Rangers shoulder. Before I even realized it, we were at his truck and he was loading me in. Ranger slid behind the wheel and waited a few moments.

"Do you need to go to the hospital?" He asked softly.

I shook my head no.

He started the car, and took off in the direction of my house. My head was pounding so I closed my eyes. When I opened them again we were in front of my apartment door and Ranger was picking the lock to my door. The door slid open and Ranger stepped in and closed the door behind us softly. He carried me back to my bedroom and gently placed me in the center of my bed. Then he walked out leaving me by myself. He returned a few moments later with a glass of water and a t-shirt.

"Here." He passed me the t-shirt and helped me wiggle out of the dress. Had this been any other night, helping me undress would have inevitably ended with both of us, hot, sweaty, sated and passed out tangled in my sheets. But tonight I knew Ranger was concerned about me. After I slid into the shirt he handed me two advil and the water. I tossed them back and washed it down with the water. Then I lay my head down to my pillow and looked up at him. He reached over and clicked on the lamp beside my bed, and I winched as the light hit my eyes.

"Sorry, I need to make sure you don't have a concussion" He pulled a small penlight out of his pocket and shined it in my eyes. Obviously satisfied that I was in working order he slid it back into his pocket.

He sighed and looked away, when he turned back his face was blank, but his eyes were filled with guilt.

"I'm so sorry babe. The damn mic fried, and we didn't know you were in trouble. This shouldn't have happened."

Damn skippy, I knew I wasn't their fault, I didn't put up a good enough fight as he was dragging me to the bathroom.

"Not your … fault" I mumbled. I grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze to reassure him.

And just like that I fell asleep, with Ranger still holding my hand.

**Thanx for all the reviews, they keep me grounded, and let me know what you like and dislike about the story.**

**Reese**


	3. Great Explanations

**Disclaimer: Unfortunately I have nothing to do with the production of the Stephanie Plum novels. Sigh **

The next morning I woke up feeling sick to my stomach, I managed to make it to the toilet before I tossed my cookies. I stepped under the warm spray of my shower and stayed until the water turned to freezing. I was toweling off from my shower when little pieces of last night began to hit me. My only hope was that the Burg grapevine hadn't caught wind of the latest Stephanie Plum escapade. Shit Morelli would have an aneurysm. And my mom, dear God, I didn't even want to think about it. I slid into my normal jeans and a baby-tee, dropped a couple grapes in Rex's tank, and went of to the bonds office.

As soon as I walked in I spotted Lula and Connie leaning against Vinnie's door in a sad attempt to eavesdrop. Either the President of the United States was in there, or Ranger, I chose to go with the latter.

"How long's he been in?"

"Bout ten minutes, he was pissed about something. I didn't think Batman could get pissed." Lula.

I walked up to Connie's desk and began shifting through the folders.

"Got anything for me."

Connie slid into her chair and handed me a couple folders.

"Milo Gorbalski wanted for attempted robbery, apparently he accidentally shot himself in the foot while he was waiting in line. You can't actually call that attempted robbery because he didn't even say that whole this is a stick-up bit. What an embarrassment to the Gorbalski name, they spent years of pulling of successful jobs, only to have Milo muck it up." She looked thoughtful for a few moments, and then went back to filing her nails.

Good that meant there was no way I could screw this up, the guy couldn't even run from me. But considering my track record…

"Lula you wanna ride shotgun."

"Do you even gotta ask, I've been dying to test out my new piece." She reached in her bag and pulled out a Lady Smith and Weston. "I got it specifically for this here outfit, gotta accessorize. I got an image to maintain." In her former life Lula had been a hooker, but after she'd been brutalized by Benito Ramirez she turned over a new leaf, unfortunately she still dressed the part. Today she was decked out in a short bright purple mini skirt, with a matching purple halter. She looked like a cross between Barney, and a black Rosie O'Donnell.

"There will be no shooting." I said as firmly as I could.

"That's cool, I brought along my stun gun." She reached in her bag again and produced a stun gun. I was wondering what kind of artillery Lula was packing when the door to Vinnie's door opened a crack, I started walking toward the door.

"Com'on, Lula let's ride." I shot out the door doing my best bat out of hell imitation.

If I didn't know myself any better I would say I was trying to avoid Ranger. Good thing I know myself pretty good.

Lula slid into the jeep a few seconds later.

"Girl what's wrong with you? I think you need some donuts. Your blood sugar's probably screwed up."

I pulled out the parking lot, and looked in my rearview mirror catching a glimpse of Ranger walking out of the bonds office. Sliding my glasses into place I gunned the engine and took off.

"Yeah I think your right, it must be my blood sugar."

Ten minutes later we pulled up to Milo's house. It was in the roughest part of the Burg so I was happy I brought Lula along with me. I stalked up to Milo's house, Lula falling in step behind me, and hammered on the door.

"Bail Bond's office open up." I shouted.

The window shades parted just a bit so I knew he was there.

"Com'on Milo, I know you're in there, open up."

"Go away, stupid Bitch." Came a reply from inside.

I hate when guys call me that.

"That wasn't very nice Milo. Now we can do this the easy way or the hard way. The hard way being I bust down the door, stun gun you ass until your eyes fry, and drag you to the station like a flopping fish on dry land. What do you say?" I heard the backdoor slam.

I looked at Lula, "Guess we do this the hard way.

We took off toward the back yard. Lula stopped running after a few steps.

"You keep…going girl." Pant. "I'll guard the… front case…he comes this…way"

Milo was hobbling along the yard in a desperate attempt to escape. I almost pitted him. Almost. I caught him in a mid-air leap. We tumbled to the ground, cursing, and rolling around. Finally I gained the upper hand and kneed him in the groin. His struggles immediately halted.

"Let's go." I panted pulling him to his feet, and dragging him to the jeep. Lula opened the backdoor for me and I threw him in.

"Girl, what's wrong with you, you went all Clint Eastwood on me. I thought you were gonna bust a cap in his ass."

"It's that time of the month." I lied.

"Oh that's cool, you wanna drive to the woods. We can tie him to a tree and you can pound on him a little more, you know blow off some steam."

Milo instantly shut up.

A few minutes later I was dragging him in into the police station, and ignoring his whining. I turned him in, and went to the receptionist area to pick up my body receipt.

"Wow look who it is, long time no see." I looked up to see Carl Costanza smiling down at me. "Got any important cases going on, it's been a while since you've blown up any cars, I could use the extra money."

I gave him my best Burg girl glare.

"Thanks for that vote of confidence. Morelli in?"

"Naw he's caught a bitch of a case, so he's pullin overtime."

Behind him I saw his partner Big Dog approaching.

"Hey Steph, when you gonna blow up another car, I need some quick cash."

Another opportunity to use the Burg glare.

"Ha ha you guys are a riot."

I snatched up my receipt and took off before any of Trenton's finest could come up with any more lame jokes. It was dark when I dropped Lula back off and picked up my check. I rode to Pino's figuring no matter how bad my day was. Pino's pizza could cheer me up. It didn't.

I was about halfway through my pizza when none other than Joe Morelli walked in…followed by Terri Gillman. My radar when into full alert, but I ducked my head behind the menu so they wouldn't notice me. As they walked by I heard a bit of their conversation.

"Cupcake, I won't be able to see you tomorrow, I've got plans." Morelli

That's when I began to see red, not only was he cheating on me, but he had the nerve to call her Cupcake. Instead of listening to my inner Stephanie and pulling out my gun and unloading the clip into Morelli, I waited until they were done eating and followed them. Right to the Star-side Hotel. The tears began to form, but I refused to let them fall just yet. It's pretty much written in the Burg's copy of The Rules of Engagement handbook never to let the enemy see you cry. And Morelli had just made his way to the top of my enemy list.

I waited until they walked to their room before I jumped out the jeep. I stood outside listening to the moaning and creaking of the bed before I finally reacted. I knocked loudly on the door and in my best Spanish accent called out.

"Excuse me, Senor, there is a problem with your car."

After a few moments the door opened and Joe stared back at me. I pushed the door open wider and looked at Terry who was sprawled across the bed, naked beneath the covers. Finally I looked back at Joe.

"You lyingcheatingsonovabitch" I slapped him hard across the face.

He just stood there looking at me blankly with his mouth gapping open. I turned on my heel and stalked off to my jeep. Joe caught up with me before I made it to my jeep.

"Look Cupcake I can explain." I whirled around to face him.

"Don't you ever call me that again." I was tempted to slap him again, but he wasn't even worth it.

I tried to turn around again, but Joe grabbed my arm.

"Please don't do this."

"No, let me go." I said through clenched teeth.

"No Cupcake, I can explain, please."

"Fine Joseph, explain." I waited a few moments while Joe just stared down at his bare feet.

"Great explanation." I turned around again. Then as an afterthought I whirled back around and kneed him in the groin. He went down like a sack of bricks.

"I told you not to call me Cupcake again."

When I sped out of the parking lot he was still crouched over on the asphalt groaning.

**A/N: Thanx for the reviews. Ya'll sure know how to make a girl blush**


	4. Hardball

**Disclaimer: I own nothing, nothing I say.!**

When I got home my answering machine was blinking, I pressed the play button and grabbed a beer from the refrigerator.

"Hey Cupcake it's me, I really need to talk to you, call me when you get in."

Not likely

"Stephanie it's your mom, what's this I hear about you beating up a wounded man. Why can't you have a normal life, I hear there's a job opening down at-"

The machine cut her off. Thankfully she hadn't caught wind of my very public breakup with Joe.

"Hey Steph, It's Mary-Lou. I heard about Joe. Call me when you get in and we can go vandalize his house."

I smiled

"Babe"

My smile instantly faded.

I deleted the messages finished off my beer.

I walked over to Rex's tank and dropped in another couple grapes. Sadly Rex is probably the closest I'll ever get to actual offspring, especially since Joe and I are no longer.

Four beers, one tequila shot, and two donuts later I was stumbling off to my bedroom in a drunken haze when I heard the locks on my door tumbling. I grabbed the nearest object that I could use for a weapon. It was an empty beer bottle. I started to laugh which caused me to drop the beer bottle.

"Oops." I dropped to my knees and began crawling after the bottle. It landed against a pair of big black boots. Uh-oh. My gaze slowly traveled upward, until they landed on a pair of dark brown eyes.

"Babe."

Shit.

"Ranger"

"What are you doing?"

"Yoga" I offered.

"Try again"

"None of your business." I stumbled to my feet trying my best to look indignant.

"Why do you care? I tink… I think you made yourself perfectly clear when you told me to go back to Morelli. Great idea by the way."

Ranger stared at me silently. Fine buddy give me the silent treatment I'm just getting started anyways, I thought mentally rolling up my sleeves.

"What is wrong with you?" I took a step forward. Big mistake, I pitched forward, and Ranger's hand shot out to steady me.

"Don't touch me." I shouted shrugging his hand off me.

"Babe…"

"Don't babe me. Leave me alone. You obviously don't want me. So just leave me alone. What did you think maybe you could supply a pity screw for me. Well, Ranger screw you. Maybe you and Joe should get together so you can compare notes."

He took a step forward at the mention of Joe's name."

"Don't compare me to him. I would never hurt you"

"Yeah right Ranger. Well surprise, you already did a pretty good job of hurting me before. What like screwing me, and then telling me to go back to Joe wasn't painful. Maybe you should look up the definition of hurt, because that's exactly what you did."

"Now go away." I emphasized each word with a hit to his chest.

Finally his arm snaked around and pulled my arms tightly to his chest so I couldn't hit him any more. My lower lip quivered, the dam broke, and I began to cry.

"Com'on Babe you just need some sleep." His arms slid under my knees and before I could protest, we were already on the way to the bedroom. He gently laid me down in the center of my bed and I had a sudden sense of De je vu.

"What's wrong … with me?"

I swear I heard him say

"Your perfect Babe, Joe's just to stupid to see that."

I was so tired I didn't even hear him leave.

I woke up with an alcohol-induced headache and my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth. I took a look around, Ranger was gone. Thank God, before I was avoiding him, now I was hiding from him. From what I could remember we had exchanged a few words last night. Okay so maybe I was the only one was exchanging words. I dragged myself out of bed and into the shower. Then I dragged myself out of the shower, and to my closet. I threw on a pair of jeans and a baby-tee. Then took off to Macdonald for 'The Cure'.

One large Cola, and Large French fries later I was feeling like I actually might make it through the day. That was until I saw Ranger's black porche parked outside the office. I figured maybe I should wait a while until he calmed down. Like maybe forever.

The shades in the window parted, and I could feel those warm brown eye's focusing on me. Beckoning me into the office with his jedi mind tricks. I quickly diverted my gaze toward the dead bushes outside the bail bounds office. Never knew they could be so interesting. I looked back at the window and those warm brown eyes were still staring at me. I narrowed my eyes, fine he wanted to play hard-ball I could wait him out. Yeah buddy, I chuckled to myself, you have no idea who your messing with.

Two minutes later I strolled into the Bond office with my head held high muttering obscenities under my breath. All talking ceased as soon as I walked in. Connie, Lula, and Ranger all stared back at me. Thankfully before anyone could say anything my phone rang.

"Ello."

"Cupcake." Joe.

"Hello Joseph." I said perkily. "Hang on for a second kay." I turned and calmly walked out the door, threw the phone on the ground, took out my gun, and proceeded to unload my clip into it.

When I walked back into the office Lula, and Connie were looking at me with their mouths wide open. Ranger was smiling.

"What?" I asked innocently the smoking gun still dangling from my hand.

Connie shrugged and passed me a file. "Here's a quick one."

The phone rang and I had a sneaking suspicion of who it was. Connie cleared her throat and answered. I tucked the gun into the back of my jeans and pretended to glace over the file.

After a few moments Connie passed the phone to me.

"Stephanie, listen to me. I'm a cop. I could make your life miserable. I don't want to do it. Just come over so we can talk."

"Are you threatening me. You know Joe you really are a piece of work, first I catch you screwing another woman, then you try to strong arm me into getting back together with you.'

"No Stephanie I'm just trying to get you to listen."

"By threatening me you sick son of a-" The rest of my conversation was cut short when someone snatched the phone out of my hand.

"Listen up Morelli, because I'm only going to say this once. Do not attempt to call Stephanie. Do not try leave her notes. And if you value your life, you will stay away far from her until she contacts you herself. Understood."

Sheesh. What a way to get the Trenton PD on your side. Ranger paused for a moment then he replied.

"It became my problem the moment you made her cry." He calmly hung up the phone then turned around to face me.

"I need to talk to you outside." He gently guided me out the door, and into the alley behind the office with his palm on the small of my back.

I could see the headlines already. "Missing Woman Found Floating in Delaware River."

I shivered and shook the foolish thought from my head. Ranger would never hurt me. Probably…

Ranger did the ESP thing again and tilted my head up with his hand. "Babe I would never hurt you."

Always good to know.

"Look, I'm sorry that I hurt you. I was trying to protect you."

I snorted. "You didn't do a good job."

"Hey even super hero's make mistakes every once in a while. So are we good?" He leaned against me and pushed my back to the wall.

I pushed him off. "As good as we're going to be."

Ranger moved closer to me and whispered into my ear. "Don't push me away."

Then he turned and walked off, leaving me alone in the alley. I put my head in my hands and sighed.

"Could this day get any worse?"

By the time I pulled into my parking lot it was already dark. I stalked up the stairs since the elevator was out of service, trying not to think too much about this past week. When I hit my hall, the smell of Lasagna drifted down the hallway making my mouth water. I groaned remembering how empty my cabinets had been for the past couple day's, nope no lasagna for me. Beer and bread maybe, but no lasagna. I paused outside my door for a few moments thinking maybe I had imagined the noises coming from my apartment. Then I heard it again, nope not my imagination. I hesitated briefly thinking maybe I should call the cops, but then an image of Carl and Big Dog presiding over a new bet pool in my honor plowed through my mind and I decided to check it out for myself. I pulled out my gun, and opened the door to my apartment.

"Hey Cupcake what took you so long."

And here's the answer to my question about the day getting any worse.

I slammed the door, and tossed my gun onto the table. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Trying to talk to you."

"So what part of go away, don't ever talk to me again did you not understand."

"Well you never said that specifically."

"Well I'm saying it now so go." I pointed a stiff arm at the door.

Joe walked up to me and pulled my arm down.

"Com'on Cupcake, don't be this way."

"Didn't I tell you not to call me that." Joe flinched and I knew he was remembering the 'incident' in the parking lot of the hotel.

"I'm not leaving until you listen to me."

"Okay fine Joe what do you have to say for yourself?" I tapped my foot impatiently waiting for his reply. "Well."

"Look it was a mistake okay. I messed up, she didn't mean anything." He sighed a pushed a hand through his hair. For some reason I began to feel sorry for him, but then an image of him with Terri filled my brain and all pity was gone.

"No Joe, it won't work, please leave."

Joe's face turned red, and I knew he was gearing up for a fight.

"Why are you upset Cupcake, now you and Rambo can hook up and not feel guilty about it."

My head snapped back as if I'd been slapped. "How dare you Joe, Ranger has nothing to do with this." I started looking around where had I put those extra bullets at.

"No Ranger has everything to do with this." He was pacing back in forth now.

"Fine Joe whatever I'm not going to have this conversation with you, you stay, I'll leave." I tried to stalk past him, but he grabbed my arm and threw me onto the couch.

"No you're going to stay." He loomed over me like a mountain.

I jumped to my feet. "You have no right to touch me, you don't even have the right to be here so leave." All of a sudden my bat signal went on high alert. Ranger was close by.

"Joe I suggest you get out of here before Ranger pounds you into the ground."

"What you're going to sic your psychotic boyfriend on me now. This isn't over by a long shot Cupcake." The door slammed on his way out. At least he had enough sense to evacuate before Ranger showed up and made target practice out of him. A few moments later my door opened and Ranger appeared.

"I didn't know you could cook babe." He said referring to the lasagna.

Without a word I stood up and stomped to the kitchen put on potholders and pulled the lasagna out of the oven. I walked to the window, passing Ranger who looked on in curiosity. I opened the window and tossed the lasagna out the window, pan and all. It crashed to the ground with a bang. Then I heard a muffled shout.

"Hey what the-." I closed the window quickly and pulled the blinds closed.

I turned back to Ranger.

"Morelli?" He asked simply, but I could tell he wanted to hunt Morelli down like a rabid dog.

"In the flesh. I think his parting words were 'this isn't over' little clichéd if you ask me."

"Want me to handle it."

I had an image of Morelli being run over by a black CR-V and I smiled, all of a sudden Grandma Belle came into the vision, cursing me with the evil eye. Not so funny anymore.

"Umm- no I can handle it."

"Famous last words."

I smiled in spite of the image of Grandma Belle cursing me for all eternity.

"Any reason in particular you stopped by."

"Maybe"

"Oh let me guess, another job."

"No"

"Okay I give."

"Babe you give in to easily."

I had a feeling he was talking about other things as well. I felt the blush spread across my face.

"Are you going to tell me or not?"

"I just got an update on our friend Michael Rims."

**A/N: Hee hee heh I know you guyz love me, that's why I feel secure enough to leave off at a cliffhanger. I know I'll still have my faithful fans, well maybe… Hummm?**

**Reese**


	5. Intensified

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait, I've been out of town. So I'll be nice and post two chappies. **

My heart instantly plummeted at the mention of his name.

Okay so maybe he's going to tell me he's getting death by lethal injection.

"No babe, although I would suggest a firing squad."

Damn I said that out loud. I hated when I did that.

"So what's the what?"

"Word on the street is that he's going to be a free man very soon."

"How reliable is this info. This is the Burg after all, I mean really it's just as bad a gossip right?"

Ranger gave me the look.

Crap.

"So what do we do? and how scared should I be?"

Ranger grabbed my hand, "You don't have to be afraid. My team's keeping an eye on you."

"What about you, are you keeping an eye on me?"

A faint smile tugged at his lips. "Always"

Hummm?

"So who's got first watch?"

"Lester and Bobby."

"Wow two men, is that really necessary?"

"You're a dangerous woman babe."

That was a compliment…I think.

Ranger stood up and started walking towards the door

"Call me if you need me for anything."

With that he was gone, off to fight crime and make the Burg a better place.

The next morning I woke up to the sound of incessant hammering on my door. I grabbed my gun and stomped to the door, and flung it open. Lester and Bobby looked down at the gun in my hand and smiled back at me, I gave them my pissy look and slammed the door in their faces. I stomped back to my bed and climbed back under the covers. A moment later loud footsteps headed toward my bedroom.

"Go away." I mumbled into my pillow.

"Com'on Bombshell time to get up."

"No."

There was silence for a few moments and I figured they had left. All of a sudden I heard my drawers open and snickering. No way they wouldn't, would they? I flipped the covers off and spotted Lester waving a pink fuzzy thong in front of Bobby's face, when the realized they had an audience they froze comically.

"You guys are scum." I jerked myself out of the bed, and then instantly regretted it when my stomach lurched in protest I dashed into the bathroom and rid my stomach of it's contents. I was just realizing how friendly I had been becoming with my toilet, when someone knocked on the door.

"Hey bombshell you aright."

I mumbled something close enough to yes stood up and washed off my face. When I was done I looked into the mirror and almost screamed when I saw my reflection. It's a wonder Lester and Bobby hadn't run when they first saw me. I took a quick shower, then jumped out and spent a while trying to tame my hair. Then I did the full make-up thing, blush, lipstick, eye-shadow, and mascara. Partly because I was going to be rolling around with Rangers men, and partly because I didn't want people to think I was letting go of myself, because of my low-down-cheating-boyfriend Morelli. I threw on a pair of hip-hugging jeans and a black baby-tee.

When I walked out I found Lester and Bobby had migrated from my bedroom to the living room.

"That didn't sound so good Bombshell you sure your okay." Bobby asked concerned.

I nodded then wrinkled my nose. "What's that smell?"

Lester frowned. "Bacon and eggs, I thought it was your favorite?"

I shrugged. "It is I just don't feel much like eating."

Bobby looked at me thoughtfully for a beat and then shook his head.

"So boys how do you feel about taking a shopping trip." I said brightly

Twin looks of horror crossed their faces and I smiled evilly.

"Oh come on boys I thought you were supposed to be all around badass-bou"

I was cut off by someone knocking on the door. I automatically jumped up and headed towards the door, but Bobby grabbed me and pulled me behind him while Lester pulled out his gun. Playtime was defiantly over.

Lester checked the peephole and unlocked the door, taking a moment to nod at Bobby. I suspected there was some kind of silent communication going on between the two. Lester threw open the door, looked left, then right, and then finally looked down. I struggled to peer over Bobby shoulders, and see what Lester was crouched in front of, but he kept me safely tugged behind his back.

Lester stood up holding a red gift bag in his hand. "Ranger's not going to like this."

"Hey what about me, am I not going to like this." Common sense told me no, but in the past I never really listened to common sense, so why start now. Finally feeling quite certain that no immediate danger was going to pounce on me Bobby let me go. I shot out from behind his back and stormed up to Lester and snatched the bag out of his hand.

"What the-" I raised my hand and cut him off.

"Look buster if anyone should be mad it should be me. Yes Ranger did tell you to keep an eye out for me, but he did not tell you to invade my privacy, so back off."

I turned my attention back to the gift bag leaving Lester and Bobby momentarily stunned.

Before I could talk myself out of it I reached into the bag and pulled out a black lace teddy. There was a note attached to it, which I stupidly read out loud.

"I've been thinking of you, have you been thinking of me? Wearing nothing at all, but this black teddy. Love Mike. P.S- I'll be seeing you soon." I reached farther in the bag and pulled the photos. There were four in total, all of Ranger and his men, all with their faces marked in crosshairs, as if someone had been targeting them with a high powered gun.

Shit.

My ears began to clag and darkness swarmed my vision. I plopped down on my couch, only I missed and hit the floor instead.

"Ouch."

Lester grabbed me by my shoulders and pulled me upright and set me on the couch. A few seconds later Bobby appeared into my line of vision holding a cup of water.

I drank it greedily.

"Okay guys, no reason to get bent out of shape, I've had worse things sent to me."

I grimaced as an image of a foot in my refrigerator swam my head.

"Well none of them were really threat's against you. Oh God, you need to get away from me, I'm like a freakin' black widow. I'm bad luck. Head for the hills while you still can."

Bobby ignored my babbling and whipped out his cell phone. "Yeah it's me boss, we've got a problem."

I went into my bedroom and closed the door and locked it. Then I quietly opened my window and slid onto the fire escape. The rational part of my brain was telling me I was a dumb ass, but the part of my brain I normally listen to was cheering me on. I could deal with people threatening me, but I draw the line at people threatening the people I love. Even if the people I love could single-handedly invade and destroy Columbia overnight.

I clamored down the ladder and dropped to the ground. I took a quick scan of the area making sure there was no one around sulking in the shadows, sporting an 'I'm going to kill you Stephanie Plum' T-shirt, and then took off to my jeep. I was fumbling with my keys when someone grabbed my arm, spun me around, and yanked me forwards. I stumbled forward, slamming in to the wall of Rangers chest. I let my gaze travel up as slowly as I could to his eyes.

"Where the hell are you going Stephanie." Uh-Oh, we were back to Stephanie, never a good sign.

I just stared.

"Never mind, let's go. I'm going to get Lester and Bobby, then I'm taking you to the safe house."

Ranger began dragging me harshly towards my apartment. No way was I going back up there without a fight. I dug my heels into the ground tried to twist away from him. Ranger glanced back over his shoulder. "Your not going to make this easy, are you?"

I shook my head, and Ranger sighed. I could practically hear him saying "Why me." In his head. He loosened the grip on my arm, and I took off in the direction of my car. He caught up with me almost instantly. I opened my mouth to scream, but his palm covered it before I could let out more than a squeak.

"Damn-it Steph hold still, I don't want to hurt you, but I'll knock you out if it means keeping you safe." My squirming intensified, and Ranger reached in his pocket and pulled out a white cloth. "Sorry about this Babe." I knew what it was just by looking at it, it was chloroform, I been knocked out enough times with the stuff to recognize it anywhere. Ranger removed his hand from my mouth.

"No Ranger, please don't do this." I gasped out.

I was still struggling when his placed the cloth over my mouth. I tried to hold my breath figuring maybe I could fake it, but then Ranger said.

"Como'on babe don't fight it."

I was running out of air quickly. As soon as I took a breath my vision began to fade and I felt dizzy. He took the cloth off my mouth and caught me as I fell limply into his arms.

I heard myself weakly saying. "You promised…you wouldn't hurt…me." Then I passed out.


	6. Hard Questions

**A/N: Here's that extra chapter I promised. As always thanx for the great reviews.**

I woke up angry. Normally after I get knocked out it takes a while for me to remember the turn of events that led to my unconsciousness, but this time I remembered exactly what had happened. Ranger had happened. I realized two things simultaneously, one I was in the backseat of a moving truck. And two, I was handcuffed to the door. That meant my chances for an escape were equal to that of hell freezing over. I sat up ignoring a spell of wooziness, and my eyes narrowed as I saw Ranger driving in the front seat. I wanted to slap him, but I was handcuffed. I looked down at my feet and was debating kicking him in the head when he spoke up.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you Steph, I'm already pissed off enough as it is."

Whoa back up buddy.

"Your pissed" I screeched. "You knocked me out, handcuffed me to a door, your kidnapping me, which by the way is a federal offense, and I have a blinding headache and your pissed, by the way what are you doing toting around chloroform for anyway."

Ranger glared at me in the rearview mirror. "I'm the one asking the questions, now what the hell were you thinking today, Rims could have been waiting in the backseat of your car."

I glared at him silently.

"You're giving me the silent treatment now? Real mature Stephanie."

I flipped him the bird.

"I saw that."

Finally I did the only thing I could think of. I began to scream.

"Damn-it Stephanie cut that out."

I screamed louder. Ranger yanked the wheel and stepped on the brakes. He threw open the door and bounced out, I could hear the gravel crunching under his feet as he stalked to the back door. Now I was really screaming out of fear of what he would do to me. He yanked open the door and slid in beside me. He gently picked up my feet and put them in his lap. No wait this wasn't right, he wasn't twisting the silencer onto the gun. He leaned over and for the second time that day put his palm over my mouth, effectively smothering my screams.

"Babe, please stop it."

I instantly shut up at the sound of my nickname. He removed his hand.

"I'm sorry." He whispered it so softly I barely heard him.

"I don't give a damn what you are Ranger. My boyfriend just cheated on me with Terri, queen of Slutville. I got attacked by a psychotic rapist. And right now I'm currently handcuffed to the back of your truck, being carted off to God knows where after being knocked out by one of the few people I ever though I could trust, so don't you dare talk to me about sorry. I'm sorry for ever trusting you."

Ranger's head snapped up. "What can I do to make it better?"

"How does dropping dead sound to you?" I asked crossly.

"Don't hold your breath for that one babe." He looked up and his game face was back in place. "I'll un-cuff you if you promise not to run."

I nodded.

He leaned over me pressing his body down on mine as he fiddled with my handcuffs. My arms slid out of my restrains and I felt the pain instantly surge through my wrist. I moaned and he gently took a hold of them. He began massaging them with the tips of his fingers. I felt the blood begin to flow normally and the pricks of sharp pain subsided. Then I became aware of the fact that Ranger was still sprawled across me. I looked into his eyes and saw them darken with desire.

"Look Ranger I know your worried but I'm fine, I can take care of myself you know, I-"

Rangers lips crashed into mine smothering my words. I let out a moan and wrapped my arms loosely around his neck. He shifted his body, and I could feel him pressed against my thigh.

"God babe, I want you, but we can't do this here." He whispered roughly in my ear. I blinked and became aware of the fact that we were still in the backseat of his truck. Then I felt my stomach about to declare full on mutiny. "Ranger, get off of me."

His brow furrowed and he looked down at me. "Ranger, I'm going to be sick." Ranger instantly slid out of the truck, dragging me with him. As soon as I stepped out I ran to a grassy spot, and proceeded to get sick. Afterwards Ranger handed me a towel and gave me time to clean my face, before I could protest he scooped me up in his arms. Somehow he managed to open to the door with me draped in his arms, and settled me in the front seat. I closed my eyes and leaned my head back. When I opened my eyes again we were still on the road, going God only knew where. A Diner sign caught my eye, and my stomach began to growl.

"Ranger pull over at the Diner." I pointed at the sign.

"You still feeling sick."

"No I'm feeling hungry."

Ranger shot me a questioning look "You just threw up, you sure you wanna eat."

"Please I'm seriously hungry."

"Your not going to try to run away, are you?"

I threw up my hands. "Run to where, I don't have the slightest idea where we are. I'm just really hungry okay."

Ranger guided the wheel into the parking lot, and before he even put the car in park I had jumped out and begun to follow the smell of food.

In the end I ordered two slices of pizza, two chicken wing, large mashed potato's, mac and cheese, and an apple pie. Ranger just stared at me in horrified fascination as I devoured the food as if it were a kid's meal.

"What haven't you ever seen a person eating before?"

"No one eats quite like you babe."

"Thank you I'll take that as a compliment."

"Babe, are you okay. You've been acting weird, not that that's not normal, but you've been acting really weird."

I furrowed my brow. "I haven't been acting weird, why would you say that?"

"Never mind, let's roll out."

Ranger paid the bill, which was kind of sad since all he had to eat was a salad and unsweetened ice tea. Guess he was still holding strong to that whole 'my body is a temple' thing. And he thinks I'm weird.

After another hour of staring at the passing scenery Ranger slowed down the car and turned into a gravel road. I peered through the trees trying to spot the safe house.

"Don't bother the house is deep in the woods."

O-kay.

I plopped my head back into the headrest and twitted my thumbs.

Ranger grabbed my hands. "That's really annoying."

"So-rry." I wasn't really.

I started click my tongue.

"Babe…"

"yeah?'

"You know in some cultures it's okay for a man to cut out a woman's tongue."

I instantly stopped clicking my tongue. Jeez all he had to do was ask. I sat iron-rod stiff the rest of the ride in fear of getting various pieces of my anatomy cut off. Finally after a few more minutes of driving in silence we pulled in front of a cabin. I felt my eyes widen as I looked at the sight in front of me. The cabin was huge. It was built with soft aged wood. I foolishly thought maybe we would be staying in a cabin like "Little House on the Prairie." But this was nothing like that. I stumbled out of the Trailblazer and stared up at the cabin in awe.

"You like?" Ranger asked.

Before I had a chance to reply to front door of the cabin opened, and Lester and Bobby ambled out. Shit.

I smiled what I hoped was and endearing smile. "Hi guys."

"Don't even try it Bombshell." Lester grinned. "You're so in trouble."

I jumped behind Ranger, and he laughed. "Hey don't hide behind me. I'm not going to save you."

Lester and Bobby let out a hoot of laughter and grabbed me. Bobby hefted me up over his shoulder and hauled me off to the house.

"You guys I should warn you, I'm not feeling all that great, if I puke on you it's your own fault."

Bobby grunted and put me down onto my feet. His face turned serious as he led me into the house. "Are you still feeling sick?"

"Not really, I guess I'm just tired." I yawned and leaned against the wall.

"Well you should go lay down for a bit, I'll come up and check on you in an hour or two."

"Your not going to poke me with a needle or anything are you." I grinned.

"Hey I'm the medic, I can poke you with what ever I want to." He gave me a wolf grin.

I smiled coyly. "Hey whatever, if you want to play doctor, I'm all up for it."

"Yeah right and who's going to bandage me up, after Ranger gets through with me."

My smile faltered. "What do you mean?"

Bobby shook his head. "Nothing, forget it, go get some sleep."

He guided me to a fully furnished bedroom and walked out. A few seconds later he returned carrying a large black bag in one hand, and my tank with Rex in the other. "Here's your stuff, you should find everything you need, if you don't tell me and I'll make a run for you."

I smiled at him sleepily. "I think I love you Bobby." I gave him a kiss on the cheek.

When I leaned back he was blushing. He shook his head and walked out closing the door softly behind him. I bent over and smiled at Rex.

"Maybe it won't be so bad."

Rex just stared back at me I could almost hear him saying 'yeah right'

I woke up to the sound of my cell phone ringing. I groaned and rolled over blindly groping for the phone.

"Ugghh" I moaned sleepily

" Stephanie, I've been waiting for you." Rims.

I instantly shot up.

"What do you want?"

"I want you of course."

"Well come and get me ass-hole." I said with false bravo

He chuckled menacingly. "Don't worry I will." Then he hung up.

I hung up and threw the phone against the wall. I heard a banging sound in the back of my mind, and it took me a moment to realize it was someone knocking on the door.

"You decent Bombshell." Bobby.

"Yeah."

He walked in with a serious expression on his face. "We need to talk."

All thoughts of the previous phone call flew out of my head. That statement was just about one of the worst anyone could hear. People said 'we need to talk' when they were about to break-up with someone, or when someone had died.

"What's wrong is my family okay?"

"Yeah their fine, it's you I'm worried about."

I frowned why was everyone worried about me, I mean besides the fact that I had a homicidal rapist/murder out to make me his next victim, or that I had just caught my boyfriend doing the horizontal tango with Terry, but hey nothing unusual about any of that.

He continued. "I need to ask you a serious question, and I need you to answer honestly."

I rolled my eyes. "What's with the dramatics Bobby, I'm sure whatever it is, is no big deal." I grabbed a bottle of water and took a sip.

"Okay then." He paused and took a breath. "Are you pregnant?"


	7. On the Run

**A/N: Under threat of death, I decided to go ahead and post this next chapter quickly. Plus I felt bad about leaving ya'll hanging from the proverbial cliff.**

I choked on the water. "What, No, why would you say that. There's no way... I mean I would know. Right…"

I stared up at Bobby.

"Oh my God, My appetite, the throwing up, the mood swings. Oh shit."

Bobby grasped my hands.

"We need to be certain. I have a pregnancy test in my office…" He trailed off.

I just stared at him hoping maybe I would wake up.

He tightened his grip. "It's going to be okay. If you really are pregnant you'll make a great mom."

I smiled grimly. "You don't have to lie."

He stood up. "I never lie, now wait here and I'll be right back."

As soon as the door shut I started pacing. I wasn't cut out to be a mom. Half of the time I forget to feed Rex, so how the hell am I going to raise a child. Oh God what about Ranger. When Morelli and I were together, I was on the pill. When he gave me the ultimatum I stopped taking them. Enter Ranger. Shit, his stupid commando sperm had impregnated me. Well possibly impregnated me, there was still a faint glimmer of hope that maybe I wasn't pregnant.

Someone knocked on the door.

"Come in." I shouted with my back to the door. The door opened and I turned around and walked into Ranger. I closed my eye hoping it was a nightmare, but when I opened them he was still there.

"What's wrong?"

"N-Nothing, why would something be wrong. Not that things are right, but at the moment I'm okay." I stammered.

"Babe."

Stupid ESP.

"Okay I have to tell you something and your not going to like it." I paused to see how he was taking it.

Stoic face, arms loosely across his chest. He was the epitome of relaxation. Not for much longer, he was going to kill me.

"So, Ranger I think that I might-"

A knock at the door interrupted my confession. Bobby stepped in.

"Hey Bombshell you want me to come back later?" He asked looking between me and Ranger.

"No!" I shouted, and then looked at Ranger. "Ranger can we finish this later. I have something that I need to do." Before he could reply I turned and walked towards Bobby who was already heading towards the bathroom. A warm hand settled on my upper arm and held me in place.

"Babe, you can tell me anything. Remember that." He kissed my neck and then walked out leaving me breathless in the middle of the room. Damn Ranger always has to have the last word. One day I was going to get the last word, no way would he send the mother of his child to a third world country. Probably.

I slowly walked to the bathroom to meet Bobby hoping to prolong the process. I took a deep breath and pushed open the door. Bobby was perched on the edge of the tub reading a box he held in his hand. When I walked in he stood up and handed me the box. I looked down at the box and realized I was crying. My tears blurred what I suspected was the pregnancy test.

"Hey now, don't cry sweetie." Bobby pulled me into a hug.

"I'm not crying, I'm checking to make sure my tear ducts work." I mumbled into his shirt, which was already damp from my tears.

"Now, there's the Bombshell I know and love."

I looked up at him. "You really love me?"

He smiled. "Of course I do, all of us do. And if your pregnant that little baby of your will be so loved. He'll have me and Lester, Tank…Ranger."

I sighed and placed my head onto his chest.

"Bobby you should know, that if I am pregnant, Ranger is the father."

"I figured." He whispered.

I pulled back and mentally cracked my knuckles. "Okay lets get this show on the road."

Bobby nodded and walked out the door.

I placed the pregnancy test on the counter and began pacing.

"Okay I can do this, all I've got to do is pee on a little stick how hard can it be." I sighed

Ten minutes later I walked out of the bathroom and stopped in front of Bobby. He looked up and me. "So…" He prompted.

"So… I can't look at it. Please just tell me." I thrust the pee stick in front of him. He took it from my hands, and patted the seat next to him. "Sit down."

I sat. "Just tell me okay, straight up." My legs bounced up and down as I chewed my nails nervously. I could almost hear my mother telling my how unsanitary that was, but hey I'm about to find out whether on not I'm going to be a mommy. I think I'm entitled to a little nail biting.

Bobby grasped my hand and looked down at the test. "Well Bombshell your pregnant."

My head felt suddenly light and dark spots swam into my field of vision. I put my head between my legs. "No that can't be right. Oh God, when Morelli cheated on me I got drunk, and then the chloroform. See the baby's still in me and I'm already a horrible mother. I can't do this. I've got to go." I jumped up and ran out of the room. I dashed past the kitchen where Tank, Ranger and Lester were talking.

"Wait, Steph." I could hear a heard of footsteps chasing after me and I sped up. Getting caught was not an option. I spotted a set of keys lying on the table next to the door and snatched them with out breaking a stride. I ran out of the door blindly searching for the cars. I spotted them at the far end of the house and ran faster. I hit the clicker and looked for a car to light up. The black BMW parked the closest blinked and I dove inside and locked the door. By the time I looked up Ranger, Tank, Lester, And Bobby had surrounded the car like a pack of hungry wolves.

"Stephanie, get out of the damn car." Ranger snarled.

"No." I started up the car, and slammed down on the accelerator. Luckily Lester had enough sense to dive out of the way just in time. The car fishtailed as I turned onto the gravel road. I looked back just in time to see the guys run into the house. Presumably to get the keys to they're cars and chase me down. I pressed harder on the accelerator. I hit the main road going about 70 and didn't slow down. No cars had caught up with me yet, so I figured I was home free. The car phone rang and I cringed knowing exactly who it was.

"Hello" I answered bracing myself for the wrath of Ranger

"Stephanie turn the damn car around right now, or I swear to God-"

"You swear you'll do what?" I cut him off. "Tie me to your bed, or maybe you can just take me out to the woods and off me. Don't threaten me, I've had enough of that to last me a lifetime."

"I don't make idle threats." Ranger growled. "And trust me when I catch up with you, and I will. I'll make sure you don't get away again."

"Oh bite me Batman." I yelled into the phone then slammed it down. The phone rang a few seconds later and I ignored it. By the time I found the Jersey turn pike, the phone had rang over a dozen times. I drove mindlessly for a couple hours trying to imagine my life as a mom. A single one at that, there was no way I could tell Ranger. And even if I told him, he wouldn't be around. His life didn't lend it's self to relationships. An hour later I pulled into my parking lot. Thankfully I had been wearing my jacket with my keys in the pocket. I took the elevator to my floor, and stepped out cautiously. Scanning the hallway for possible psycho loonies, and Merry Men. All clear, I ran to my apartment opened it in record time and dove in. I locked the door back and leaned against it. Even with the door locked Ranger could still get in. I pushed my couch and T.V stand against the door as a makeshift barricade. I was sweating by the time I was done so I went off to take a shower. I stood under the spray until the water turned cold. My head still spun from the fact that I was pregnant. What would my mom say? what would Morelli say? But most importantly what would Ranger say? I wrapped a towel around my body and stepped into my bedroom humming to myself. The fact that I was going to be a mom was starting to grow on me, or rather in me. The hum died in my throat as a shadow fell across my shoulders. I looked up and found myself staring into the eyes of Michael Rims.

**Thanx for the reviews, they keep me writing.**


	8. Trapped

**Disclaimer: See previous pages, because I'm getting pretty sick of typing this crap over and over again.**

In retrospect, going to my apartment wasn't one of the smartest things I could have done. As a matter of fact it was right up there with jumping out of a plane without a parachute. But in my defense, I was still reeling from the fact that I was going to be a Mommie. Back to the present.

" Hello Mrs. Plum."

"Actually it's Ms. Plum." Okay not sure why I had to do it, but it's annoying when someone is about to kill you and they can't get their facts straight.

"Oh, forgive me, Ms. Plum. I've been waiting."

"Have you? Well forgive me for barging in and ruining your waiting process. As a matter of fact I'll just slip into some clothes and be out of your way. That way you can get right back to waiting." I began to inch towards the door. Which was pointless since I had barricaded myself in

"Ah ah ahhh. Ms. Plum I don't think so." He grabbed my arm and stilled my movements.

"Really, then what do you think?" I asked. Stephanie Plum master of stall tactics.

"I think me and you need to go somewhere a little more privately and have ourselves a nice long…chat, what do you think."

Well personally I would have preferred to have my eyes poked out with hot needles, but hey why piss him off.

"That sound's nice."

Michael smiled obviously pleased with himself. My hand inched closer and closer to my lamp.

"See I knew you wanted me the other night, why'd you go all ice queen on me."

"Because my ex was there. I didn't want him to see me with you, he might have hurt you." My hand brushed the cool metal lamp and I prayed feverishly that I wouldn't miss.

"So you want to-" His sentence ended abruptly as the lamp came in contact with his head. He slumped to the floor in a crumpled heap, and I ran into my room and quickly donned the towel for my jeans and baby-tee.

No way I was going to be killed in a cotton towel. If I had my say, It'd be a nice Gucci dress, low cut, and spaghetti straps. Preferably black. I'm a burg girl, if I'm going to be taken out, it's going to be in style.

Seconds later I creped out of my room, and slunk towards the door, being careful not to disturb Michael's intimate nap on the floor. I was almost there when an arm reached out and snatched my ankle. I let out a shriek as I crashed to the floor. Then out of pure instinct and the grace of God my foot came into contact with Michael's face. He grunted as he took the blow and his grip loosened. I shot to my feet and darted back to my bedroom. Slamming and locking the door, and effectively locking the psycho loony out. I heard him crash into the door.

"Com'on Stephanie we're getting to be good friends."

Yeah right, and I'm not attracted to Ranger.

"I'm calling the cop's Mikey boy, let's see how friendly you are with them and the boy's in jail-block D." I lied

He let out a string of curses and kicked the door. "How much you wanna bet I can get in and get you before they get here."

He slammed against the door again and the wood splintered a little.

I ran to my window and tugged it open and crawled out onto the slippery fire escape. No way I was staying around to see if he would win the bet. I stumbled down the rain-slicked stairs until I had to stop to pull down the rest of the staircase. I tugged at it, but it wouldn't budge. I looked down, it wasn't a bad jump, if I didn't mind breaking both of my legs and possibly my neck. Rails clattered and I heard clamoring above me and I looked up to see Michael making his way down after me. Shit. I ran back up a set of stairs to someone's window and banged on it. "Help, let me in."

The lights were off. Nobody was home.

My fingers slid along the wet glass. "Please help."

I looked back up and watched as Michael slowly made his way down to me. He knew I was trapped so he was taking his time. The rain slapped against my face and blurred my vision, but I ran down the stairs until there was no more stairs left. Tires squealed as a black CR-V swerved into the lot. A glimmer of hope sprang through my body. Ranger was here, but would he get to me before Michael did? The doors opened and Ranger, Tank and Bobby jumped out.

"Ranger." I shouted. "Help."

All three glanced up and saw me. Even from the distance I could see the anger glinting in his eyes. I just hoped it was directed at the psycho above me.

"They can't get to you Ms. Plum." Startled I whirled around and looked at Michael. He grinned evilly, and grabbed my arm.

"Let go of me." I shrieked "you sorry son-" The rest of my cry was smothered my Michaels lips. I pushed and hit his shoulders, but he continued the assault on my lips. Finally I cracked when his shoved his tongue into my mouth, I bit him as hard as I could.

He screamed and pushed me back against the rail.

"You stupid bitch, your just like the rest of them."

Pain coursed through my body as he backhanded me.

"I'll teach you."

His fingers circled around my neck and he began to squeeze.

I spit in his face and he squeezed harder. My air began to run out and I clawed at his fingers. This was it, I was going to die, and so was my baby. Tears streamed down my face.

"This is what you deserve-" Suddenly Michael stopped in the middle of his rant and his fingers loosened their hold around my neck. I sucked in air and let out a few coughs. As I glanced back up I saw blood on my hands. I looked at Michael, his shirt was soaked in blood. I looked down and saw Ranger holding a smoking gun. Then I looked back at Michael, his eye's glazed over, and he smiled. He took a step to the edge and grabbed my arm. Before I realized what he was doing, it was to late. He jumped over the edge and tried to take me with him. I screamed and tightened my hold on a rail, but Michaels dead weight made it almost impossible to hold on I shook him off, but on the way down he grabbed my leg and I slid down after him. My legs dangled helplessly and I hung on for all I was worth.

**A/N: Thanx for all the reviews, they keep me on my toes, not to mention crack me up. I'm sorry that your pain brings humor to me, I'm just twisted that way. Just kidding. In case you haven't noticed I've been posting hell-a-fast. Probably because I'm working on another fanfic, this one's a Harry Potter fic for all you Draco and Hermione luvers, but I won't start posting until about a week after this story is done, which it will be in one more chapter. So thanks again. **

**Reese out **


	9. Tag Team

**Disclaimer: I own nothing… nothing I tell you. **

I glanced down and saw Michael lying on the cement in a broken heap. His blood was pooling around him, and mixing with the rain.

"Ranger, help, I'm going to fall."

I watched as Ranger ran to the CR-V and dove in. Shit, he was going to leave me? I knew I had pissed him off, but jeez a little help would be nice. I looked up at my hand and watched as my fingers whitened. When I looked back down the CR-V was parked underneath me. Ranger jumped out and stood on the roof.

"Let go Babe, I'll catch you."

"No, I can't." I let out a scream as one of my hands lost its grip and flipped down making me swing wildly. "Ranger."

"Babe, trust me. I'll catch you."

My arms strained under the effort to hold my body up. Stupid Tasty-Cakes, if I made it out of this alive, I was defiantly going on a diet. I looked down again and saw Ranger looking up at me. I met his eyes.

"Promise."

"Promise." He nodded.

I took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and let go. You know how on TV people say during a near death experience they see like a montage of certain parts of their lives. No montage for me, the only face I saw was Rangers. I felt the air whirl around me as I dropped, my screams echoed off the walls, but I kept my eyes closed.

"Babe it's okay, I got you." I opened my eyes, and realized I was lying on top of Ranger.

"You caught me." I breathed

"Yeah, I caught you Babe, missing wasn't an option."

I guess this was Rangers way of saying 'yeah I still want you around'.

I burst into tears. By the time I stopped crying the police had arrived and I was wrapped in Ranger's jacket and sitting in the CR-V with Bobby while Ranger talked to the police. I glanced up at the top of the car roof, which was now caved in. Yup it was time for a diet. Although some of the weight was Rangers I reasoned. Shivers went up my spine, and I knew Ranger was on his way over. He stopped in front of me, and knelt down.

"You ready to go home?" He asked softly.

"Umm Ranger I am home."

"No, Babe I mean my home." A smile tugged at his lips.

"What about the police? Not to mention my house needs to be secure. And what will these people think? What would my mom think if she found out I spent the night at your place?" I realized I was rambling, but this was my way of trying to process the turn of events.

"Plus what happens if-" Ranger held his finger to my lips in order to keep me quiet.

"You think to much Babe." His lips met mine in a bone-melting kiss. Fire burned low in my belly, and my legs turned to spaghetti. Good thing I was already sitting down, or else I would have slid to the ground.

"What were you saying?" He pulled back and smiled.

I stared at him blankly. The grin widened.

He scooped me up and carried me to the passenger side. "You think your so irresistible don't you? Well you know what-" His lips smothered the rest of my rant.

By the time my brain was back online, I realized we were in his car driving down Sickler Street. I glanced over my shoulder and was surprised to see the back seat empty.

"Bobby caught a ride back with Tank." He said reading my thoughts.

"Good." I cleared my throat. " Because I need to tell you something."

"Babe, you can tell me anything." He gave my thigh a reassuring squeeze.

I gulped. "Well you see Ranger… What I mean is that…When we." Shit this was not going the way I had planned.

"Okay fine here goes. I'm pregnant and you're the father." Thank God for anti-lock brakes. The CR-V squealed to a stop and I closed my eyes, waiting for the worst. It never came. When I opened my eyes again Ranger was staring at me in awe. Then a smile slid across his face.

"That's what you were so afraid to tell me? That I'm going to be a father."

O-kay not really what I had pictured, I'd envisioned myself being cased down the Jersey Turnpike with an enraged Ranger behind the wheel of his CR-V. My mother always said that I had an over-active imagination. Not that I was complaining about Ranger's reaction.

"Stephanie, I know that I sent you back to Morelli, but I did it to keep you from getting hurt. I didn't want our relationship as friends and partners take a hit when we became lovers. But I was wrong. So wrong qeirada."

Wow this from the man of few words. Will the wonders ever cease?

Ranger looked deeply into my eyes. "I love you."

Apparently not. I would have been less shocked if Morelli had walked up to me, and told me he was gay.

Horns blared in the background and people shouted, but I paid no attention to them. I was too focused on the only guy who I had ever truly loved. My eyes blurred with tears, and I placed my hand on his cheek. "I love you."

As his lips crashed against mine, I soared. Wonder woman was back. I knew things would be complicated. Mostly I would piss him off, and he would hold things back from me. But we would make it, because in the end true love always prevails, plus Wonder Woman and Batman make a kick ass team.

**The End**

**A/N: Sorry it took me a while to post, but I wanted to make sure the ending was as good as I could possibly make it. Well thanx a bunch for reading my story, and for those who reviewed thank you that much more. **

**Reese**


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